Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.” Alan Alda
“Books and minds only work when they’re open.” James Dewar
“The mind that opens to a new idea never returns to its original size.” Albert Einstein
I have a secret. One that I’ve been keeping hidden out of fear that people would judge me. I realized that I feared that people would judge me because I judged myself, but my friends, the time has come and I’m ready to share…
I am on an online dating website.
(Pause for reaction)
What? Not the news you were expecting?
Not the juiciest news ever?
Well let me explain…have you ever said to yourself, “I would never do that in a million years!” I’m sure you have. Come, on. Wrack your brain a little if you have to. We all have something that we find scary or lame or not worthy of us trying. For me it was online dating.
(Disclaimer: Total honesty ahead and I don’t want to offend anyone in the online dating world. This was just my thought-process at the time.)
In my mind online dating was lame. It was for people who were probably socially awkward and were using it as a crutch for not having to meet people in real life.
Then I found out that my cool friend Kelly had a blog. And I started to read her blog. And I came across a funny, candid post about her foray into the online dating world. And I though, “Kelly is a young, cool, attractive chica and she’s online dating. Maybe I should check this out. Why am I so against it? And anyway, what have I got to lose?”
So I find a site that seems promising and I create a profile complete with pictures and a description of who I am. The messages start rolling in. I find one guy who is handsome, successful and seems promising. We go on some dates and we connect in an amazing way! I can hardly believe it. One thing leads to another and before you know it…We’re engaged!!!!
No! Nuh-uh, seriously!? I hope you didn’t fall for that. I’m sorry. Now I feel bad. I’ll bake you some cupcakes, k? 🙂
What did happen was that I did go on a few dates and I met some really amazing guys. A few have become good friends. I guess that now you’re asking, “If you didn’t find the love of your life then what’s the big deal? You’re still single and all you have to show for it is some new friends? Big wup.”
Well, yes big wup for me.
What I found out was:
1.) that if I am dissatisfied with an area of my life it is 100% up to me to change it. Before online dating I was feeling stuck. Like “Where have all the good men gone?” (Yes, I just quoted Bonnie Tyler.) Now I feel empowered in my love life. I created access to a range of guys and I can choose who seems genuine and attractive to me. And who knows, I may find a guy I want a relationship with. (Btw, you can totally tell who is in it for sex, who is just looking for fun and who is seriously looking for a relationship.) It helps you weed out the bullshit and find what you want which saves a lot of time in my opinion.
2.) If I was wrong about this, then what else might I be wrong about??? The experience literally opened up my mind. Now I am trying new things and questioning previous assumptions and it’s so exciting because I am learning something new about myself every day!
All from a website I thought was totally lame!
So I felt it was important to share this with you gals. Open your minds ladies. Take a chance and take charge of your love life! It feels great, I promise!
Love you 😉